Those I Never Knew

I've always been jealous of people who know their Great-Grandparents. I feel like I've missed out on something somehow because the last of my great-grandparents died in 1992, a mere four years before I entered the world. I realize that I am blessed to know all four of my grandparents, and I love them dearly, I truly do, but I also sometimes feel like I am missing out on something because I never met any of my great-grandparents.

This week I had the opportunity to delve into the life of my Great-grandfather, John Lynn Esplin. He was the first of my Great-grandparents to die when he died in 1947. Although I haven't yet delved very far, talking with my Grandma about a father that she barely remembers was enlightening and I loved every moment of it.

John Lynn Esplin (1904-1947)

My great grandpa always said that he was born 100 years too late. He loved the outdoors and the range and would rather be out with his sheep all day than in the city. Grandma said that he was out to herd a lot, because he loved it and "If it wasn't for mama he would stay out in the hills all the time."(Jeanette Hugh, May 27, 2015)

Grandma told me that Great-Grandpa had a lot of integrity, and always would see a job through. She also said that the first thing Lynn (Grandma assures me he went by his second name, see comments below) would ask when getting home from being with the herd was where her Mama was.

In 1947 Lynn came down with pneumonia and went back to the herd when he wasn't fully recovered and so was in a weakened condition. Grandma said that one day her Daddy and Lynn (her then 14-year-old brother) went out, but only Lynn came back in, great grandpa didn't come back. It was two days before they found his body at the bottom of the cliff that he fallen off of. Two days, and Grandma was only 10. Grandma wasn't the youngest either, what about Verla, Carol and Jerry? They were all younger, how well do they remember their father?

I was reading through more of my grandma's old blog posts and read how "Daddy read a lot and was especially interested in national and international news, politics, government leaders and national events" (Lynn Esplin, "I Remember May") and thought to myself "So that's where I get it from!" I mean I know a lot of my family is interested in such things, but my parents aren't as passionate about as I am. So now I know. I get it, at least in some small measure, from a man I never knew. 

I never got a chance to meet Lynn. I think I would have loved to sit and chat with him. I think I would have loved to get to know him. I know I would have loved him, and I know that I do love him. I sit here writing with tears of love in my eyes, because I can feel him, feel his love for the great granddaughter he never met in this life, but the great granddaughter he will definitely get to meet in the life to come. 

I sometimes still feel jipped that I didn't get to meet my great-grandparents. But I also realize that because of the great Atonement of our Savior Jesus Christ, I will get to meet them and converse with them and all the others who have gone before. 

And I also realized a couple of months ago, that I don't truly know the grandparents I have now. I was talking to my Opa and had no idea that in college he had majored in biochemical stuff and zooology. So I guess what I'm saying, is perhaps we should treasure what we have and endeavor to learn from those we have in our lives now. The eternities will take care of themselves. And a forever family, is just that, forever.
  

Extreme Studio Home Makeover: Olsen's Edition

     My day started out bright and early, 8 am. Seriously, that's early in the summer, so be nice. I was conscripted by Dan and Shelby for the use of my pathfinder to get their new dresser. Which, lets be honest, was ugly. I don't know who thought the red, white and tan went well together, but they were crazy.

      So Shelby and I went down to Brigham City where her father-in-law had things like an electric sander, and scraper. But then we had to go get primer from her sister-in-law in Plain City. After obtaining primer, and also coarse sandpaper, we set to work. The top of that thing was awful. There was a layer of polyurethane on the top and it was awful.  We needed to rough it up a bit in order to make sure our primer would stick and stay. It took me at least an hour and a half with an electric sander to get the top to the point where paint would stay. In contrast the sides and front took a half an hour tops. Then we started to add our coat of primer. It was lookin' good. Way better than when we began, even with only a layer of primer.


     Then we helped pick up branches around the Olsen's yard from the wind storm the previous night. After the paint dried and we'd talked to Daniel's parents we loaded up the dresser and went back to Logan. By this time it was almost 6. We had to get a bunch of things from the hardware store, but then we went back to the Olsen's studio apartment. There we set up the dresser again. This time to do the actual color coat. The dresser would be red and the drawers, black.

     After three coats of paint it was now almost 10 and we called it a night, also a wrap. that dresser was done. . . as soon as it dried. While we had been waiting for the paint to dry Shelby and I finally put up the decorations that she had had since her wedding but couldn't put up on the walls.

So 15 hours later, the studio home makeover: Olsen's edition was complete, and it turned out beautiful too. 

Help! I'm trapped!!

 . . . in a very LDS mindset. I've realized recently that I am trapped in a mindset of "You're 19, or 20 or early twenties" and not engaged and you don't have a boyfriend? Why not?

AND I HATE THAT.

I've even thought it about myself. I'm nineteen, single and loving it. But seriously half the people around me are either engaged, about to be officially engaged or in a serious relationship and I've wondered why I don't have one. I have come to this conclusion, which I already knew, I do not want one. Nor is there anyone, currently, that I would want to be in a relationship with. It's not like there aren't guys I'm attracted to in my immediate vicinity. There are. There are definitely males in my ward and social circles (aka just my ward, sad I know) that I am attracted to, but I don't know any of them well enough to want to be in a relationship with them. I'm kind of old fashioned that way. First, I want to know someone and be friends with them before I want to be in a relationship with them. Or even think about being in a relationship.

Anyway, somebody needs to keep me on topic. the LDS mindset.

Anyone that has had exposure to our culture knows that we tend to get married young. My two roommates are getting married at 19. I know of two other girls that are only 19 who are also getting married this summer. Others I have known got married at 20 and 21. Some go on missions but then get married soon after that. So the LDS mindset is that people should be dating and or married young.

but you know what I've realized? You really don't need to be married young. And I'm sticking to that. our brains, specifically the pre-frontal lobe, aren't fully formed until 24 or 25. that area of the brain contains our decision making skills. So we're not fully formed right now. okay, we're only half baked.

Now I'm not saying marrying young is bad, it isn't. What I am saying is that not being married young isn't bad.

Sometimes I get caught in the mindset that  young women my age either need to be on missions, or getting married. and I'm not doing either.

And I'm perfectly fine with that. I'm going to get my education, I'm going to work my hardest, I'm going to see the world. and if I'm not married at 20 or 21, or 22, or even 23. I will be fine. I don't need to be married anytime soon.

So my dear post-high school friends who aren't going on missions and aren't getting married. You're in good company. And really, who cares when you get married. if the love of your life comes along when you're nineteen, snatch him up, if he doesn't come along until 25, so be it, snatch him up then.

Being single is a joy, don't get trapped in the mindset that you need to be in a relationship or getting married, because living by yourself gives you great experiences you couldn't learn if you never lived on your own. And lets be honest, right now I struggle to take care of myself most days, how in the world could I care for another human being?